Windows

When the blackness comes,

Windows block me

Keep me inside

Jailing me from the sun’s warmth

From the wind’s cleansing breaths

Trapping me inside

Walls and Self

 

And yet,

The blackness,

The bleakness,

Can make it seem like there are windows all around

And I am trapped beyond them

Outside when I’m only looking

For where I belong,

Where I fit in

 

I can see these pictures

Of families gathered inside

Where there is light and warmth

Love and acceptance

Where everyone has a place

And I am standing in the dark

In the cold

Observing

 

But those windows

Are not real

They are what people offer as pictures,

As stories,

Of what they choose to show as real

Not what is, in fact, real

 

What windows do I seek?

 

I seek windows to the soul

Windows to meaningful connection,

Truth, not lies,

Relationships not fantasies,

The real light of day spilling in through the panes,

The glass pushed up,

The sash thrown back

Windows that are only doorways

For nature to enter here

For me to crawl out, if need be,

But always for reality to exist

 

As hard, as good, as it is

Because eventually the blackness lightens

Eventually the dawn will come

And I have survived this far

My record stands

As reminder in the dark

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4 thoughts on “Windows

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